Sy Rogers is a Christian minister, married father and a man who lived as a woman for two years in preparation for a sex change operation.
Around that time, as he ventured into an average American church, he learned something of the real meaning of love, a message he shared in Sydney on the weekend, some 20-30 years on.
Feeling that the word ‘love’ has been over-used and stripped of meaning – we love our family but also love our new shoes – he replaced it with the word ‘value’.
‘For God so valued the world, the he gave His only Son…’ or ‘Greater value has no one than this, that they lay down their life for their friends’.
He said love – or his definition for it – value, is delivered, communicated or made real to others through three things:
1. Acceptance – which says ‘I’d rather have you messy than not have you at all.’ Because someone is valuable to God and valuable to us, we accept them as they are. This is where love/value begins.
2. Accountability – which says ‘because you are valuable I won’t leave you where you are, but hold you accountable towards a better day’. It’s the kind of accountability that doesn’t leave a friend playing dangerously on a busy highway, but says ‘ for your own good, because your valuable to me, get off the road’.
3. Affirmation – which says ‘I’m going to show you that your valuable, not just by what I say, but by how I treat you.’ Affirmation is when we communicate that what happens to someone we love, matters to us – rejoicing with those that rejoice, and weeping with those that weep. We need affirmation because of insecurity – ‘a fancy word for fear, a fear that says “I doubt my value”‘.
May your day be full of the giving and receiving of acceptance, accountability and affirmation because you are of great value!